Went to see my sister and cousin race there go karts, not much else apart from two rainbows. 🙂 🌈 this time last year I would have been in Florida and two years ago I would have been in hospital sectioned, how things have changed.
Duty doctor called me with my urine results and wanted me in hospital to have Intravenius antibiotics but I said no, so going to try the tablet forms for a few more days. I see this as good as if I don’t take them or drink fluid I could get even iller pretty quickly, I’m in control and its up to me what happens next. He said it was quite serious.
Haven’t spoke to anyone today, been really suicidal. Had a nice long sleep with Joshua.
I don’t feel safe from any one. I know that my neighbors are working with the “mental health team” aka spies. I’m scared. I’m scared of myself. im scared of what I may do.
Had therapy but had to walk out as I was too scared that the “mental health” team are after me. I called my gp who’s hopefully going to call me back today, I need someone on my side. I’m scared to answer the phone incase it’s the team. I’m scared and not sure what to do?
I’ve called the doctor because I’m in so much pain with my side, and was in a lot of pain this morning. I’m not sure I should take my medication, it’s only been upped so I keep quiet. I took the new dosage last night, and felt no different, but that was only one dose. I feel I shouldn’t take any more because it’s what the spy’s want. They want me to be sleepy so i don’t notice them creeping around my room, I can see the SPYders very clearly. But I’m scared of them and can’t reach them thank goodness. They are horrible but if I don’t give them anything to go back to head quarters. Doctor just called I need antibiotics again was only on them a few weeks ago. So a bit annoying but hopefully will help with pain, I can take these ones as they are from my doctors surgery and not the”mental hospital” where there spy’s and not really doctors. I helped a lady in her wheel chair over the curb and in to her car. My car is playing up again. Went out for a little drive with joshua. Food shop came 1/2 hour early. He looked like the man who attacked me, and really scared me. I’m really anxious now. Also I’m so drowsy I think it might be the medication. Im scared.
Done quite a bit, got a few duals on and went for a walk with Joshua, went for a little drive. Signed up to do the marathon in May. It’s 26 miles in the whole of May, going to do a mile a day roughly. It’s for the British heart foundation. Going to try and call my doctor tomorrow as still really struggling.