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Saturday 21st may 2016

Felt really low and I wanted to hurt myself. 

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Friday 20th may 2016

I went to see my doctor today, luckily because my neck is so painful. I went up town and got some painkillers on my own. I did my steps, and cooked dinner. I also spoke to a few friends and family members. 

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Thursday 19th may 2016

Did my steps, 

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Wednesday 18th may 2016

I’m trying to keep myself busy, because I can feel the spiders crawling over me. But I can’t see them just feel them. I did a video of myself yesterday and it was good to talk through how I was feeling. I’ve desided I want to do videos to help others in similar situations to me. I’m also taking pictures of my body so I can chart the progress I will make. 

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Tuesday 17th may 2016

Saw my CPN had a good chat, although I called her today, because I feel suicidal. I can’t find much motivation, but I did go outside and I was very proud of myself. 🙂 

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Monday 16th may 2016

I didn’t do much today. Did loads of steps, starting to loose weight properly. Hopefully! I’m too fat and ugly.

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Sunday 15th may 2016

Went to visit some waterfalls had a lovely time. But was very tiring. Did a fair amount of walking very pleased about this. 

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Saturday 14th may 2016

Didn’t do much. Did a bit of tidying, 

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Friday 13th may 2016

Today I’m anxious, really anxious. I know it’s just because what the voices are saying. They are commanding me to hurt myself, and I don’t want to, they are telling me I’m not safe from the spies and I know that, but what can I do, I can’t stay in because I’m constantly worried about people getting in and collecting my dna and I can’t go out because there’s too many opportunities for them to take me to collect Dna. I don’t know how I feel about medication and taking it. I’m confused it makes me feel better sometimes but also other times it makes me worse. I need to tidy my flat, but I can’t find the motivation. I’m worried about eating and drinking incase it’s been poisoned. I wish the voices would stop, and then I would be less anxious. 

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Thursday 12th may 2016

Today I waited in for a delivery and received it. I set it all up and it is amazing. I went over to play with my sisters, had a good chat with them. Went for a walk, and saw some baby ducklings, they were so cute.