Went to see my doctor today was really good as he had noticed my weight loss and I was very happy about that. He also listened and gave me something to help with how I’m feeling at the moment. Got an better night sleep last night. Now at parents waiting for them to come home so I can see my sisters. My weight is still the same, hoping to loose 6ilbs in 10 days. I will be so happy if I succeed.
Waited in for a parcel which I’m very halpy about. I called my acting CPN and says about little sleep, and panic attacks and anxiety. I was refused any medication to help with my anxiety, and I’m very annoyed as I’m really struggling. But they said they will look in to sleeping tablets. Went to my brothers grave and it’s got new stones that are blue it looks lovely. I also put some flowers down and on nans.
Did a lot of tidying had a really bad panic.
A month until it’s my brothers birthday, I feel very anxious and scared, I did get a good night sleep yesterday and I had some dinner. I’m seeing my acting CPN in about 20 minutes as well as my support worker. I’m very anxious and worried. It’s been 4 years since the family dog fudge got put down, I didn’t realise it was that long ago. I’m very anxious about what decision im going to make next about my life and what I want to achieve, it’s all so confusing, because I’m trying to think about everyone it will effect and I can’t please everyone.
Today I talked to my care team and my family. I feel a bit low and scared still. I don’t know why I feel so bad.
Been on my own again today. Had a call from increase support saying my cousin was worried about me as they haven’t seen me. And that they were going to call the police. I left a message saying I’m fine and don’t need contact, I hurt myself today.