Mental health

Good bye 2017.

It was a very eventful year.

  • I became a auntie,
  • I got sectioned,
  • I lost weight, and then put all the weight back on,
  • I lost my driving licence,
  • I got Dylan,
  • Lots of family arguments,
  • Visited lots of beaches and waterfalls,
  • Started clozapine and pregabline,
  • Visited a hearing voices group,
  • Had a blood transfusion,
  • Played in the snow,
  • Signed up to the marathon which I didn’t get a place,
  • Signed up to RED, running every day for Mind, which starts January,
  • Visited London a few times,
  • Went to a winter light display,
  • Went up town on my own,
  • Spend Christmas with my family,
  • Watched my two youngest sister race there go karts,
  • Went to the safari park,
  • Gym membership renewal,
  • Asked to be a God mother,
  • Gave in to alcohol and drank too much,
  • Went to Ireland for a family wedding,

This is a few things I can think of, it’s been an eventful year.

I hope 2018 is a more positive year.

Happy new year to you all. Lots of love.

Charity Mental health

RED- Run every day, January for “MIND” the charity.

I saw a running event called RED. Which stands for Run Every Day. It’s to raise money for mind, the mental health charity.

I signed up for it and I’m really looking forward to giving it my best, I’ve already gained some people to sponsor me. This is a big motivator.

As you probably know I suffer with mental illness.

I suffer from emotionally unstable personality disorder, anxiety and schizophrenia. I’m currently in recovery of depression, OCD, and anorexia.

I’m raising the money by running every day so people like me are able to get support with their health.

Feel free to sponsor me or join in with the run.

Mental health

Cheese cake for breakfast.

Cats Mental health

Cats Christmas blankets

Anxiety clozapine Emotionally unstable personality disorder Future Health healthy hospital Medication Mental health Personality disorder psychosis scared Schizophrenia

Fed up of these weekly blood tests.

Clozapine has given me my life back.

I feel things have improved so much since being on it, but the weekly blood tests and trying to remember to take it twice a day make it so difficult to look just at the positives.

I will admit. Clozapine is the best antipsychotic I’ve been on and trust me I’ve nearly tried them all.

exercise Food Mental health Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

Weight loss

I’m very pleased that even though it’s over the Christmas week, I’ve lost weight, nearly 3 pounds.

I need to keep trying, I’m so pleased,

I might look okay by the time of my nieces christening, that’s my goal.

Mental health

I’m fat…no you have fat.

I am not fat, but I am carrying extra fat. I’m just in to the healthy weight, according to the British NHS bmi chart.

I can get rid of it, and I’m trying my best.

Mental health

TRIGGER WARNING————Fighting the urge to harm

Had a stressful night last night and day today.

I brought my parents a present just from me, and my three sisters aret happy about that because the plan was to just do a present together.

I know I’m the one in the wrong. But I saw them and thought my parents might like them.


My sisters texted me a lot about how unhappy they are about it. So I said sorry and took the presents back.

It seems the texts where they are nicer to me about this are the ones effecting me the most.


They are being nice to me… maybe it’s because I don’t feel like I’m worthy to be nice too, i was the one in the wrong.

I’m sorry… I’m sorry… I’m sorry!

So this is making me want to harm, but the thought of being able to go swimming tonight or wearing short sleeves in the next few weeks is stopping.

I’m also not sure what to do about my parents presents or if I should even be with my family this Christmas?!?!

I’m sorry.

Anxiety beach clozapine Mental health Schizophrenia

Yep it freezing and I’ve gone to a beach.

Anxiety clozapine Cpn delusions Emotionally unstable personality disorder hallucinations Health healthy Medication Mental health Personality disorder psychosis Schizophrenia Voices

Medication update.

Hopefully no more changes. I think I’m at the right dosage.

I’m on…

  • 400 mg clozapine
  • 500mg pregabline
  • 2mg diazepam
  • 1.25 mg bisoprolol
  • Kwells
  • Vitamin b complex

They are really helping me to not be symptomatic.