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anorexia Anxiety eating disorder Mental health Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

What I gained from loosing my anorexia!

Trigger warning- anorexia! ⚠️

I gained so much from recovering from my anorexia.

Although I’d say I’m weight restored but I still worry about food and weight so much.

I wish I had my anorexic weight back just so I could feel valid having all the anorexia thoughts.

But I’m the short term I’ve gained that I can actually eat in-front if people, I can eat some full fat foods, I enjoy foods including pasta so much,

But

This all comes with guilt, and worry.

I hate how I look but I’ve never liked how I look. Never!

I want to look nice and thin but will it will it be enough.

I want these thoughts to go away.

I’m not longer diagnosed with anorexia although I think I may have atypical anorexia as my weight is restored but I have so many anorexic traits still to this day, will they ever go?

Will it ever be valid enough?

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Anxiety borderline personality disorder bpd delusions eating disorder Emotionally unstable personality disorder Emotions Health Mental health mental health blogger Personality disorder psychosis Schizophrenia self harm Therapy

DBT booklet arrived.

I’ve been very lucky over the years to have received NHS and private therapy.

But I’ve never tried DBT, I’ve heard it’s good especially for people with EUPD and BPD.

I have EUPD and I’m hoping I can work through this booklet and teach myself.

I really want to have a positive life and I feel this is taking the next step as well as being in control of my own safety.

Have you tried it?

Do you think I could do it on my own by going through the booklet?

I had a first look and it looks like it might be really helpful but it looked complicated, and for someone who did well in GCSE I thought I could understand it but it’s harder than I thought.

I can do this, can’t i?

Categories
eating disorder Mental health

I passed the first module!