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Mental health Sisters

You made my day.

Made up, thank you for the gift you gave me. Xxx

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Mental health Sisters Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

Weight gain. Hate myself.

I hate myself so much, and today’s weigh in has made me really determined to loose this weight.

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Dad Emotions family Future Happy Lonely Mental health Mum Past Sisters

Christmas lights?

My family always put up Christmas lights out side the house, we all love seeing them so why don’t we help dad put them up?

There’s enough of us to help him get it done really quick and then, dad won’t be out in the cold for hours.

I think dad is feeling the same this year, because they have just been left up from last year.

We don’t support or help him enough,

I’m sure they will look as good next year, just as they did last year.

Christmas lights,🎅🏼❄️☃️🛷

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Anxiety blogger Emotions family Future Health i did it Mental health mental health blogger Miscarriage nature Pregnancy Pregnant self harm Sisters

TRIGGER WARNING-scars

I’ve self harmed for years, every scar has a story and meaning. They are evidence of surviving and my life. I had this tattoo designed by scratch, the flame symbolising my brother who’s not here, and all three of my sisters chose a flower. So my arm has been changed from showing my scars and story to the love of my family

Tattoo covering my scars up.

First pic my scars… second the design…the finished tattoo.

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anorexia Anxiety Dad family Food healthy i did it Mental health Mum Past Sisters

Invited to dinner with my family.

My dad texted me inviting me to a meal with them, this is just how things are now, I don’t feel welcome around there without an invite.

It brightened my day he even came and picked me up. Had a lovely time with them.

I haven’t had a roast since last Christmas, so 10 months. I really enjoyed it and dad was happy to see a clean plate from me, as the times I’ve eaten over there I’ve either been in the grips of anorexia or thinking my food has been poisoned.

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Anxiety brother Dad Daily update depression Disappointment Emotionally unstable personality disorder Emotions family Mental health Mum Personality disorder psychosis Schizophrenia Sectioned self harm Sisters

Dear mum

I want to make you proud.

I’m never good enough and you don’t make them effort to spend time with me or even talk to me, even though you do to my sisters.

I feel I will never be good enough for you.

I think it’s because of my mental illness, I know your embarrassed of me.

I’m so sorry.

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Anxiety family Mental health self harm Sisters

My sister decided to do a spell.

Her spell was making a potion and making people that are hurting not hurt.

I think she meant emotionally as she saw my scars again today and she isn’t silly.

Melts my heart. ❤️

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Mental health Sisters

What being a big sister means to me?

I haven’t been much of a big sister too all three younger sisters. I’ve been so wrapped up in my illnesses to spend time with them and look after them.

Yesterday I had the chance to be a big sister. I did it successfully. She was so happy for my help she asked if we could do loads more things together. This terrifies me, but I will try to step up to the challenge.

I love being a big sister. There is hope. XxxX

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Mental health Sisters

Blow art.

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Anxiety Emotions family Happy Mental health reborn Sisters

Last weekend of July.

This was the last weekend of July and we're back to Monday and the usual routines.

I was planning on spending Saturday on my own but in the end my sister texted me saying all three of my sisters are going bowling do I want to join. At first I was thinking no as mum had upset me the previous day, but that doesn't mean I should take it out on my sisters, so I went.

I had a great time, I helped my youngest sister win the second game she was so happy. She went and picked up my drink at the end so I could finish it. I said "thank you", she said, "it's the least I can do, you helped me win" she is only 10 years old, I think that's so lovely.

I then went back to my parents house with them. Had a great time doing blow art, it was so therapeutic, that's what the picture I'm including will be from. So overall a great day.

Then Sunday I had a massive achievement I went in to a shop and did the food shop with a lot of support, but I did it.

Then took my reborn doll Joshua out for a walk. It chucked it down with rain but it couldn't have been more refreshing feeling the rain roll down my face, and feeling free.

Last this to conclude the weekend, I dyed my hair purple. I know it's just gone 3am but I can't sleep.