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diet exercise Food Health healthy mental health blogger Over weight Overweight slimming world Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

I’ve gained so much weight back in two days! So upset!

I hate myself so much.

I have to loose weight! I have too!

What can u do?

I’ve tried…

  • Slimming world,
  • Diet pills,
  • Fasting,
  • Exercise,
  • lots of water,
  • Healthy eating!

But I always binge, I always gained so much, even more than where I started!

What else can I try?

I’m struggling so much.

Categories
Emotions Mental health Past

Anniversary of a traumatic event in 5 days!

I’m seriously scared,

Does anyone have any tips on how to survive a traumatic anniversary?

Any suggestions will be helpful.

I usually end up harming or doing something dangerous just to try and cope with the memories/flash backs!

But I need to get a grip on this, there are so many things that trigger the memories of it or flash backs.

I’m constantly having nightmares.

I had a panic attack last night due to it all becoming too overwhelming!

Help please?

Categories
Mental health

Mental health act tribunal

It’s on Tuesday at 10:30. I’m terrified. What should I expect

Have you had one

What are the possible outcomes?

Categories
Anxiety family Mental health self harm

What do I do?

My mum asked if I wanted to go away with her my dad and youngest sister for a few days.

I really wanted too….

BUT,

Now she has said my little sisters friend is coming.

So that makes 5 people in a camper miles away from home, my carer and my cats.

I’m most worried about feeling poorly due to stopping my medication, being left out or them seeing the cuts.

What do I do?

They used to say they gave up inviting me to things because I would never go. It would be so nice to spend quality time with them.

Categories
diet exercise gym Health healthy Mental health Over weight Overweight Weight weight loss weightloss

How to tone/ get rid of my inner thigh?

I’ve been loosing weight but my inner thigh gets in the way.

It rubs and they catch on each other every time I move!

What can I do to tone it up?

Will it go down and not bother me?

It makes me feel disgusting, I need to do something about it, any advice will be greatly appreciated.

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Anxiety Cpn Doctors Health Medication Mental health mental health blogger Personality disorder psychosis Schizophrenia Support worker Therapy Voices

Advice on Quetiapine? Please!

I am prescribed 900mg of Quetiapine a day.

I’ve been taking it since April.

I have it in 300 mg three times a day.

I have cut it down to 600mg, in one big jump in one day.

What are the possible side effects/ withdrawals should I expect?

I don’t need Quetiapine anymore but when I stop taking it I feel sick and shaky.

It’s controlling me!

The voices are telling me I don’t need it and it’s poisoning me. And the evidence Is that when I try to stop it it makes me physically ill, so I have evidence it’s poisoning me!

Categories
Anxiety Emotionally unstable personality disorder family Mental health self harm

Scars and children.

I’ve had scars all over my body from self harm for years. But today unexpectedly my youngest sister who’s 10, asked what happened to my arms. I frozen. I had no idea how to explain it to her. She said she remembers me saying it was cats, but I thought about it and said it wasn’t my cats. It was an accident because I have something wrong with my brain.

I had no idea what to say to her, I’m not sure I said or dealt with it in the right way.

I don’t want her to be scared but I also want all of us in my family feel comfortable for me to show my arms.

We take it for granted being able to wear t-shirts with scars.

I’m a little ashamed of them but also glad I’m still fighting this battle.

How would you deal with it?

What would you or have you said to explain self harm scars to children?

Categories
Anxiety Daily update delusions depression Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder Emotions hallucinations Health healthy Medication Mental health Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis scared Schizophrenia self harm Support worker Therapy Voices

I’m more than my illnesses.

Yes I'm ill both physically and mentally, but I have a life away from this.

Everyday. When I wake up, I can't help but think that I don't want to live another day with the symptoms, mainly the voices, anxiety, and dizziness are the ones that effect me the most.

Today I'm trying to focus on things I do that aren't related to my illnesses.

I'm spending time with my cats and they are getting a present today, will post a picture later.

I've spoke to my family. I've had a tidy up, I'm going to continue to do blog posts, watching some things that wasn't illness related.

Even though I'm trying really hard to not think about my illnesses or give in to them, The voices are trying their best to get my full attention.

I don't know if I can do this, my life has just been built around the illnesses! I want to be more than them but I don't know how.

Any advice or tips?

Categories
anorexia Anxiety delusions depression Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder hallucinations Health healthy Mental health Over weight Overweight Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis Schizophrenia self harm Therapy Voices Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

The change from diazepam to pregabline.

I really want to get off diazepam and on to pregabline. 

I’m worried they won’t because of my blood levels, because I have lost a lot of bood.

Spoke to my cpn today, it is a possibility to do the medication change, but it will have to be really slow because of benzodiazepine withdrawal, I really hope this isn’t just talk and I can have the medication change. 

I’m more than happy to take my iron tablets to get my hb level back up to normal, I’m also agreeing to have the blood tests to keep an eye on things. If I can have my medication changed. 
Recent update,

If the blood tests results from today are okay, when my psychiatrist gets back from leave, we are all planning  on starting pregabline and slowly decreasing diazepam. 

Do you have any advice or stories about these medications? What is pregabline like? Does it help with anxiety? 

Is weight gain a side effect? I know the internet says it is, but personally is it?

Categories
Anxiety Diary Emotionally unstable personality disorder Health Medication Mental health Personality disorder Schizophrenia Uncategorized Voices Weight

Wednesday 9th November 2016

Had an okay day spoke to my gp, need an untrasound scan for my tummy and I saw my cpn for the first time in weeks, spoke about maybe going on clozapine, lots of anxiety around that, so I need some research and any advice is welcome?  Went to see my family. Think I’m going to harm voices really driving me crazy tonight.