Tag: Doctors

When will I be better? Conversation with my cpn.

Post author By rosiestar11
Post date August 17, 2017
No Comments on When will I be better? Conversation with my cpn.

As you may be aware I’m currently diagnosed with anxiety, emotionally unstable personality disorder, and schizophrenia.

These effect my daily life greatly, I can’t go out alone, I’m caught up in self harming, and I hear voices. I’ve been told these are part of my illnesses.

Previously my community psychiatric nurse (cpn) has said that I’m ill, which I think I’m finding it difficult to fully admit to myself. So I thought I’d ask her when will I be better?

She replied, when I can have a fulfilling life, achieve what I want too, and do things with out be terrified.

I agree with her, and it’s got me thinking I want to have plans and achieve things with my life.

Be able to go out alone,
Get fitter and loose weight,
Go to Iceland,
Help people,
Help out in a charity shop,
Go shopping alone,
Write a book,
Get a job working with children with special needs,
Skydive,
Run a marathon.

So there just a few things I want to achieve. I want to feel alive.

Tags anorexia, antipsychotic, antipsychotic medication, Anxiety, anxious, calories, Charity, community psychiatric nurse, Cpn, delusions, diazepam, doctor, Doctors, eating disorder, Emotionally unstable personality disorder, eupd, exercize, fat, fitness, flashbacks, goal weight, goals, gp, gym, hallucinations, Health, healthy, help, hospital, marathon, Medication, mental, Mental health, Mental health act, mental health nurse, mental hospital, mental illness, mentally ill, motivation, paranoid, Personality disorder, pregabline, protection, psychiatric, psychiatrist, psychosis, psychotic, quetiapine, scared, scars, Schizophrenia, Sectioned, self harm, spying, suicidal, support., Therapy, thoughts, trigger warning, Voices, Weight, weight loss, weightloss

Anxiety Mental health

Okay freaking out!!!!

The fire alarm is going off. And I’m doing a blog post!

It’s gone off now but I can’t see where it was coming from. It was a neighbours alarm. And it smells of bacon, And no one else is leaving there flat? Is it okay?

I think so, I’m calming down now, I’ve got the cat boxes out and they are okay.

It made me not able to catch my breath, and my inhaler has ran out. Found one but I guess I should contact my doctor, although I don’t want to communicate with anyone who can section, or hurt me. I’m keeping the power! I can’t give them any information about me and what’s going on.

Tags Anxiety, anxious, Doctors, fire alarm, gp, panic, panic attack, panicattack, scared

Anxiety Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder Emotions hallucinations Health healthy hospital Medication Mental health Mental health act Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis scared Schizophrenia Sectioned

Mental health tribunal solicitor

Post author By rosiestar11
Post date July 6, 2017
No Comments on Mental health tribunal solicitor

Just met my solicitor for my tribunal to get off my section 2, I’m not sure if I’m doing the right thing or not?

I’m really scared, it’s all so serious, how will I cope in a tribunal? What are tribunals like?

Anxiety cancer Dad Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder family hallucinations Health healthy hospital Medication Mental health Mental health act Mum Now Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis scared Schizophrenia Sectioned self harm Sisters

How I think my parents sees me being in the psychiatric hospital?

Post author By rosiestar11
Post date July 6, 2017
3 Comments on How I think my parents sees me being in the psychiatric hospital?

Today I’ve been in an acute psychiatric hospital for a week. I’ve been in this hospital and some others many times, but it doesn’t make it any easier, especially when your parents don’t support you.

Today my dad sent me a text saying that all he wants for his birthday is for me to be out of hospital. Switch it round for a second if I had cancer like my sister did he wouldn’t want to rush me out of the hospital. So why is it so different in a mental hospital.

I’m in a psychiatric hospital not a prison and it’s not a punishment, I’m here to get better because I became more unwell. Where do you go when you feel unwell, to the doctors or hospital, that’s what’s happened to me.

Mental health

Hey followers, I need your help?

Post author By rosiestar11
Post date July 5, 2017
No Comments on Hey followers, I need your help?

Hey, hope your well?

Do you have any ideas of tag and catagories I could/should use? I need help want to reach more people. My posts are realated to mental health, and cats.
Keep fighting. Xxxx

Tags Alcohol, alone, ana, anorexia, antipsychotic, antipsychotic medication, Anxiety, anxious, baby, beach, before and after, birthday, blood test, bmi, brave, calories, cat, Cats, Charity, Cpn, death, delusions, depression, devil, diazepam, doctor, Doctors, eating disorder, Emotionally unstable personality disorder, eupd, exercise, exercize, family, fat, fit, fitness, flashbacks, follow me, followers, Food, goal weight, goals, God, gp, gym, hallucinations, Health, healthy, healthy eating, help, hospital, love, marathon, Medication, memories, mental, Mental health, Mental health act, mental hospital, mental illness, mentally ill, motivation, Music, Nhs, nightmare, nightmares, Over weight, overdose, Overweight, panic, paranoid, Personality disorder, police, positive, pregabline, protection, psychiatrist, psychosis, psychotic, quetiapine, reborn, religion, safety, scared, scars, Schizophrenia, section 2, Sectioned, self harm, sister, sleep, spying, suicidal, support., Therapy, thoughts, trigger warning, Voices, Weight, weight gain, weight loss, weightloss

anorexia Anxiety Carer Daily update delusions depression Diary Disappointment Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder Emotions hallucinations Health healthy hospital Medication Mental health Mental health act Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis Schizophrenia Sectioned self harm spying Support worker Therapy Voices Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

Sectioned day five 23 to go?

Post author By rosiestar11
Post date July 5, 2017
2 Comments on Sectioned day five 23 to go?

I had Ward round yesterday, didn’t go as planned I was 100% hopeful I was going to be discharged. I was on level three someone with me at all times. I went in to the ward round believeing I was going home because all the staff that had been me told me I could probably go home. So going in there and coming out with better medication plan, and a plan to possibly someleave if my level two goes okay, so now I’m only checked every 15 minutes, but honestly they don’t keep to that they do it when ever they want roughly around once an hour. So I finally have Privacy to go to the toilet, it’s seriously a luxury.

It will only take one stone to fall and destroy all current progress.

Tags anorexia, antipsychotic, antipsychotic medication, Anxiety, anxious, bipolar, blood test, brave, calories, Cpn, death, delusions, depression, devil, diazepam, doctor, Doctors, eating disorder, Emotionally unstable personality disorder, eupd, exercise, exercize, family, fat, flashbacks, goals, gp, groups, gym, hallucinations, Health, healthy, help, hospital, love, low mood, Medication, medication change, memories, mental, Mental health, Mental health act, mental hospital, mental illness, mentally ill, motivation, nightmare, nightmares, overdose, panic, paranoid, Personality disorder, positive, pregabline, protection, psych ward, psychiatrist, psychosis, psychotic, quetiapine, religion, restraint, safety, scared, scars, Schizophrenia, section 2, Sectioned, self harm, sleep, spying, suicidal, support., suspious, Therapy, thoughts, trigger warning, Voices, ward round, Weight, weight gain, weight loss, weightloss

Anxiety Carer Cpn Daily update delusions depression Diary Disappointment Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder Emotions hallucinations Health healthy hospital Medication Mental health Mental health act Nhs Now Past Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis Schizophrenia Sectioned self harm spying Support worker Therapy Voices Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

Day 4 of being sectioned.

Post author By rosiestar11
Post date July 3, 2017
No Comments on Day 4 of being sectioned.

My first few days started off okay was a few blips, but I felt with it okay.

On day two at night things came to much it all built up so much with the thoughts going around and around and the voices taking control that I could no longer control it. I harmed and the alarms were pulled, I did it four times, they had to literally drag me away from the wall. I hate myself for that choice. Since I’ve been put back on level 3 which is where you have no privacy and your followed everywhere, always a member of staff with you one to one.

Yesterday I spoke to my main nurse she was great and had a brilliant idea of when you get worked up go in to the garden and listen to music, shower etc, some good points which I had not thought about. I have no thoughts of harming I just want my medication to be better and then to get out. I want to do a skydive when I get out to make a statement that I want to live my life to the fullest.

I had my first shower last night, it felt amazing. I’m in clean clothes and I’m sat writing this post hoping they will get a doctor so my observations can be re thought about, I would like some privacy.

I need my medication to be sorted, there’s no point being here if they won’t even put me on the correct medication. I’m hoping by getting an advocate this will really help. My point just doesn’t seem to get listen too. Feeling a bit confused at what the point of me being here is if they don’t up my medication.
I miss my cats.

Tags Alcohol, alone, ana, anorexia, antipsychotic, antipsychotic medication, Anxiety, anxious, blood test, bmi, brave, calories, cat, Cats, Cpn, death, delusions, devil, diazepam, doctor, Doctors, eating disorder, Emotionally unstable personality disorder, eupd, exercise, exercize, family, fat, fitness, flashbacks, Food, goal weight, goals, God, gp, gym, hallucinations, Health, healthy, help, hospital, love, Medication, memories, mental, Mental health, Mental health act, mental hospital, mental illness, mentally ill, motivation, Nhs, nightmare, nightmares, Over weight, overdose, Overweight, panic, paranoid, Personality disorder, police, positive, pregabline, protection, psychiatrist, psychosis, psychotic, quetiapine, religion, safety, scared, scars, Schizophrenia, section 2, Sectioned, self harm, sleep, spying, suicidal, support., Therapy, thoughts, trigger warning, Voices, Weight, weight gain, weight loss, weightloss

Anxiety Carer Cpn Daily update delusions depression Diary Disappointment Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder Emotions God hallucinations Health healthy hospital Medication Mental health act Nhs Past Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis Schizophrenia Sectioned self harm spying Support worker Therapy Voices Weight weight gain weight loss weightloss

Been sectioned.

I’ve been sectioned under section two of the mental health act.

I was going to a routine appointment with my psychiatrist and cpn, then they went out the room and brought mental health act assessments in. And you guessed it I’m now detained under the mental health act. In a mental hospital that I can’t leave, I could be here for 28 days, one day down.

Tags Alcohol, ana, anorexia, antipsychotic, antipsychotic medication, Anxiety, anxious, beach, before and after, blood test, brave, calories, cat, Cpn, death, delusions, devil, diazepam, doctor, Doctors, eating disorder, Emotionally unstable personality disorder, eupd, exercise, exercize, family, fat, flashbacks, goal weight, goals, God, gp, hallucinations, Health, healthy, help, hospital, Medication, memories, mental, Mental health, Mental health act, mental hospital, mental illness, mentally ill, motivation, Nhs, nightmare, nightmares, Over weight, overdose, Overweight, panic, paranoid, Personality disorder, police, positive, pregabline, protection, psychiatrist, psychosis, psychotic, quetiapine, religion, safety, scared, scars, Schizophrenia, section 2, Sectioned, self harm, sleep, spying, suicidal, support., Therapy, thoughts, trigger warning, Voices, Weight, weight gain, weight loss, weightloss

Anxiety Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder Health healthy Medication Mental health Personality disorder Schizophrenia self harm Weight weight loss weightloss

Gp change

I have been told a new doctor is joining my surgery and that I have been selected to be on their patient list. I have no choice but maybe it’s a good thing, I was kind of getting to a dead end with current doctor.

I will miss him, he has been great but, I guess it’s time for a new doctor.

I want to have lost a lot of weight loss by the time I go and see this new doctor. I want to be A healthy weight and look thin.

Having a new doctor Will probably mean I contact them less. I’ve got use to my current gp and I feel comfortable with him so call him quite a lot. I think I will try my best to contact them if I need them, but knowing I’ve got a new gp and I don’t know them is putting me off contacting them already.

Anxiety Cpn Daily update delusions Doctors Emotionally unstable personality disorder hallucinations Health healthy Medication Mental health Mental health act Personality disorder psychiatrist psychosis scared Schizophrenia self harm spying Support worker Therapy

Update. 26.6.17

I’ve not been taking the full does of medication. It’s making things reallly difficult but I’m still not in the belief that the medication will fix how I feel and things that are going on.

I’ve nearly halved my antipsychotic medication, I’ve been messing round with anxiety medication and my hear medication.

Honestly, I’m struggling more than I show to everyone. Every second of every minute the voices are really tournamenting me, commanding me to hurt myself, and to end my life. As you can probably guess I’m still alive so I haven’t listened to them as much as they would like.

I’m scared, and I can not cope any more, but I’m not willing to do what everyone thinks will help and take the medication, I don’t believe it will help or solve the problems I’m up against right now.

No one understands!