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Leave me be… talk to me, double sided rubber bracelet.

My bracelet leave me be in red and talk to me on green. It’s soft and nice to wear. It’s easy to swap between sides. It’s a large bracelet and as far as I’m aware they only come in inside, and it’s large, even on me and I’m an adult.

It’s a great way non verbal or verbal can express if they want to talk or not.

It’s a great way to express when they want to talk. It’s neutral so it suites both make and female.

It’s great if you can’t verbalise what you want.

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Old gp, compared to new gp? 

I’ve been very lucky with all of my gps/doctors. 

We had a family gp at a doctors surgery near where we use to live. We all saw the same gp and she was really good and understanding. I remember her diagnosing me with anorexia, I was so relieved to hear her say the words your dangerously underweight. I saw myself as fat so this was brilliant to hear for me but my mum broke down in tears, there was so much emotion in that room. I saw the same gp for years and years. I would go on my own and with parents.

One thing is that I’ve always gone to the doctors at many different times, most of the time I probably didn’t need to go but I have a really good relationship with them. 

I haven’t seen my current gp for a while, and I’m doing this on purpose. I know if I go to see my current gp he will probably notice my weight gain and my hb levels and then it could take a turn of where I need to go to hospital so I’m staying well away. 

I really do appreciate the NHS and the doctors that work so hard. 

Mental health

Breathe. Amazing magazine!

Yesterday I thought I would go and look at the magazines in my local supermarket. And I was planing on getting one about weight loss and diets, but this one was pointed out to me by my carer. It’s amazing. It’s all about wellbeing and positivity. I’ve never found a magazine so helpful. Much better than talking about diets. 

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Update on the day hospital.

Okay so i left early as usual and was there half an hour early. I was so scared. My cpn walked past me without even saying hello, i was a bit upset about this as i felt as though i had done something wrong. But i did have a hat and head phones on. So maybe I didn’t look like me as much as normal, or maybe she was just busy and didn’t see me,.

I then went in to the day hospital at 1:50, and waited out side the room. I was too scared to knock. The man who was taking the blood walked straight passed me in to get a patient to have there blood done. He didn’t know i was waiting for him. Then a doctor came down from upstairs to do my ecg. Which we spend over half an hour doing but it didn’t work, the doctor was a bit odd, he asked me to take my bra off fully. Which i dont normally do for an ecg. But anyway the machine wouldn’t work. I suggested we could use the results from the 3 day heart monitor. So at the moment im meant to be trying to get hold of my GP which i can do until the 1st as he isn’t in. So this means even longer wait for the higher medication. 

Then he doctor brought in an odd form, it was all the tests that need to be done to be able to go on to the higher dose age of medication. Made me a little worried as they weren’t really use to the form so i started to think they are trying to take my dna. But before i expressed my worries, there was another cpn in the room who i know and we were talking. She said ive lost weight since she last saw me which made me happy, and she told me my psychiatrist has asked for blood tests to check my diet. Which has made me worry a little as i know i don’t always eat what i am supposed too.

Then after three attempts we got the blood we needed, and i left. All went okay. 

As i was leaving i saw my cpn at the door so said hi, and told her what has happened and our next things to do about contacting my doctor about doing another ecg. She seemed a lot happier than when she walked passed me at the beginning. She was pleased i had managed to go to the day hospital by my self. And i said i was pleased to see her back. She is still combing to see me tomorrow at our normal appointment, with my medication. 

Over all i did it, and it wasn’t as bad as i thought it would be.